15 Crazy Confessions Of Real Disney Princes And Princesses

In the Magic Kingdom lies a world of secrets that turn out to be not-so-magical. The truth of what really goes on at the “happiest place on Earth” will leave you speechless, or at the very least, shaking your head. We all knew that Disney has had some scandalous tricks up their sleeves, what with their subliminal messaging in some of our favourite childhood movies. However, it's still surprising to us to know that the people behind the real-life prince and princesses have their own astonishing stories to tell.

Enter a world that is no longer innocent, whimsical, and fills us with happiness and hope, but is instead a parallel universe to the fairytale we've naively built up in our minds. Through some of their royal confessions, we've learned the truth about our so-called Prince Charming's and our once-favourite princesses, Ariel and Snow White. And since our dreams are now shattered, we're exposing the hidden lies that previously only the walls of Cinderella's castle had known.

Brace yourself by buckling up in your favourite tea-cup because we're about to take you on a ride that will make your head spin like the twisted tea party. While we all may be jaded now that we know the truth, let's all take a collective oath to never share these admissions with the children. Just because the magic is ruined for us, doesn't mean it should be ruined for them, too.

15 Not Your Average Princess

Awww, that is no way for a princess to behave! No one likes a get-around gal, but the fact that she's playing an innocent idol for many young girls by day and turning into a promiscuous princess by night is making us rethink our Insta-worthy group shots with Belle. Although we don't exactly know which Disney princess she's pretending to be before she sheds those gowns for the next Disney employee in her line-up, it certainly keeps us on our toes as we casually suspect every Cinderella and Ariel we see while walking around the park. No princess in our storybooks would be kissing every frog she sees, and yet this one is doing just that. I guess she just doesn't take her job as a princess very seriously.

14 Peter, You Dawg!

Our first thought when we read this was, “OMG. Was it with Tinkerbell?”, while our second thought is, “They could create their next movie and call it, The Princess & The Pete.” BAH HA! Okay, we know it's a bad joke, but we had to distract our minds somehow as it runs wild with all the theories we have about the affair, like if Cinderella is cheating on Prince Charming, or is Belle cheating on the Beast? WHAT PRINCESS IS IT? AND DO I KNOW HER? The idea that any princess is sneaking out of her castle to bed none other than Peter Pan is enough to have us question everything we know about love and romance that was created by our favourite fictional characters.

13 More Effective Than An IUD

I guess all it takes for Belle to swear off of procreating with the Beast is a little urine and the lack of a good Tide stick to rid her precious dress of the stain. To be honest, we completely get it. If someone ruined our golden, ruffled masterpiece of a gown we'd be losing our s**t, too. While this admission is making us all face the sad reality that children ruin everything, it's also making us a little disappointed that our fantasy of little French Belleast babies won't be running around the dinner table. Turns out, little ones won't be on their guest list. At least we've finally found out a reason behind why many Disney couples never have babies; dresses are too pretty, and kids are too messy.

12 Princess With A Side Job

It's shocking to hear of a Disney princess turned prostitute, and it makes us question which princess this is so we can get to the bottom of her daddy issues. I mean, c'mon! You're a princess. Is the life of royalty, castle-living, and prince kissing not enough for you, you have to earn a little kingdom coin on the side? It's always shocking to learn of a girl who lives a life of privilege and decadence totally abuse her fortunes and risk losing it all. Of course, we know she's not a real princess, but still. Being a Disney employee, and a princess at that, would probably mean that a few rules would be in place, such as not canoodling outside the royal palace with paying customers.

11 His Royal HIGHness

After a long day of forcing himself to wear a charming smile at the happiest place on Earth, Prince Charming has decided to take to the bong to relieve the tension in his jaw and face. And since his fellow princesses are in the same exhausting boat as him, it's not a surprise that one of them is also partaking in the green. Being surrounded by people and overly excited children all day - and having to interact with them - is draining and mentally taxing. If Mr. Charming chooses to unwind outside the palace gates with a long-time princess pal, we can give him our nod of approval. After all, the two will need something to wash off the stress of the day, get a good night's sleep, only to repeat and replenish their mandatory happiness levels the next day.

10 A Child's Happiness Is Infectious

Learning about the poor working conditions for this princess is just horrible. We've all had to endure the pain of a crummy job, but it seems as if Disney is not doing much to keep that pearly-white smile everlasting. Her working woes aside, our fantasies of a caring, loving princess are redeemed with this hopeful ray of light. The fuel that keeps this princess spreading magic and cheer throughout the kingdom is the happiness of children. How's that for a fairytale? This princess has shown us that there is still goodness left in the hearts of Disney characters. Just like a real princess might face some hardships within her castle, she is fulfilled by the joy that her people bring to her life and in helping others. Just beautiful!

9 A Prince Sneaking Kisses

My, my! For years Disney fans have been rooting for a gay couple to be reimagined in Disney's 2D format, but little did they know that their wishes have come true right within the gates of the Magic Kingdom! Maybe the family that caught this Disney duo wasn't too pleased to have their children exposed to a different form of love, but we know a few million people who would be cheering behind the souvenir cart and snapping pictures, tagging them with encouraging captions and #DisneySameLove or #DisneyPride. The positive reactions should be enough to outweigh the old-fashioned opinions of the family who discovered the pair, as well as the opinions of Disney. Sure, Flynn might technically be with Rapunzel, but sometimes hearts are veered in other directions.

8 Adults Who Lost Their Imagination

Unfortunately, this Disney princess has seen her fair share of evil while walking the roads of the Magic Kingdom. But according to her, it's a place that is not quite as magical as we all have imagined. It is a place where magic is stolen by a cynical and stressed-out force: overwhelmed parents. I'm sure that taking your brood of children to Disneyland is no easy feat. Between flights, a lengthy road trip, and the inevitable result of overstimulation and sugar surging through their children's souls, it's a recipe for increased blood pressure and remaining in a constant state of fight or flight. The princess may see that parent angrily crushing their child's dreams, but she will not truly understand their actions, or that magic no longer exists within them.

7 Elsa Has A Mean Streak

Leave it to the independent, self-righteous Elsa to be labeled as the Queen B. While it may be a hard pill to swallow to think of this ice princess as being a source of evil, it's not that shocking when you really think about it. Disney princesses are the ones who are meant to uphold everything that is good and right and noble within their kingdoms. But Queens are the ones who get the short end of the stick. They are the wicked ones who attempt to knock down the efforts of those do-gooder princesses. And since Elsa did technically become Queen in Frozen, maybe she's beginning to slowly come into her own. Add in the fact that she's got powers - like every evil queen - the accusations no longer come as a surprise.

6 A Prince That's A Little Too Charming

Seems like the princes of the Magical Kingdom have a libido that just won't quit. Though we suspect that with an attractive role such as theirs, many women are lining up to fulfill their childhood fantasy of ending up with Prince Charming. If their own prince won't show up, well then, she best go out and find him herself, leading her straight into this imposter's arms and bed. And if this Disney employee has to do him daily to keep this fantasy alive, well all the power to her, as there are many women looking to be the one and only slipper in Prince Charming's life. Just don't be surprised when you find out that the prince has other promiscuous princesses in his phone. Lunch time may be your hour, but who knows what Charming does come sundown.

5 Princess With A Superiority Complex

Well don't rub in in too much, princess. We get it. You've made your dreams come true, ended up in the magical, royal kingdom of wish fulfillment and love, and we're sitting here reading about your happy life, stuffing our face with pasta, and crying into our poorly-made Cinderella dress. It's one thing to showboat your royalties, but it's another to feel like you're a higher grade of human because of this employment opportunity. We clock in and out of work just like you, sister. It's not like you're curing cancer or delivering babies into this world. It's time to step off of that high horse, or unicorn, or Pegasus, or whatever wild stallion-esque animal you've managed to tame and face reality: you're not a real princess.

4 A Princess Proposal

Please let us imagine that this proposal happened before she met Aladdin! Just kidding. We know that this Jasmine isn't really in love with her fake better half, but we tend to go in and out of what's real when Disney continues to crush our spirits. But for this working girl, she holds out hope for love just as much as the rest of us, and so our heart goes out to this disappointed princess. It seems that Disney has also primed her to believe that love at first sight does exist, and Frozen opened up potential for same-day proposals, so why wouldn't she be thrilled at this almost-marriage to her own version of Prince Charming? It didn't work out today, but your prince is out there, Jasmine. Just head to your local market!

3 A Pixie-Dusted Mess

It's a hard life being a Tinker Bell, or any other Disney pixie or fairy. Between the endless flights and appearances she has to make throughout the Magic Kingdom, there is so much that is asked of and expected from a magic fairy. She has to grant wishes, protect friends, and create somethings out of nothings. If at the end of a demanding day this pixie princess has to dig out sparkles from her crevices, we totes feel her pain. It's not fun having to sprinkle joy unto others, only to have that joy come right back and hit you in the face. It's a gift we definitely don't want returned and it's a reminder of the b**ch of a day we've had.

2 Prince Charming Certainly Gets Around

In true Disney fashion, prince and princesses have a way of finding each other. Although this confession doesn't say whether the princess in this real-life happy ending is Cinderella, we'll all be happier to imagine that it is. Call us romantic or naive, but we can't help but picture a world through rose-coloured glasses, and this royal rendezvous is replacing those shattered lenses. Even though this particular happy ending is not one that begins with a walk down the aisle, it's a modern day climax that will do just as well in fulfilling our magical dreams. We're just happy that this bang carried on in the happiest place on Earth and is not of the Chitty-Chitty variety, or we'd be discussing a whole other world.

1 The Prince of The "Other" Industry

Aside from the bad publicity that Disney could have faced, just stop for a moment to think of Ariel. I mean, while she's meeting down in the sea for some much-needed sister time, Prince Eric is hitting the satin sheets behind the camera! Oh, the scandal! But let's face it, if you're good-looking and dumb, there's only a handful of jobs available to you. Playing the role of both Prince Eric and the Prince of Porno doesn't require much dialogue, if any. Still, we can't help but wonder how one goes from smiling and greeting children all day long, pretending to be an upstanding male role model, to one that uses his body for erotic entertainment? Well I guess both jobs are one in the same, if you can forget about the erotic part.